Journal 24 - Scared

I get scared quite a lot because my mind plays many many tricks on me. I tend to make my mind believe things that are not any where close to true. I see something and then I just make my mind gradually start to believe it until all of a sudden something that was a really small, or maybe something that was not even about me in the first place into all of a sudden being this huge thing that I am afraid of and do not want any part to do with. Then my heart starts beating really fast and it will skip beats and my mind just goes blank and I get really freaked out. The other day I was eavesdropping in a conversation that I could have sworn was about me. Then I kind of made myself believe that the conversation did involve myself and I was kind of afraid that it involved something bad about me. Then I asked what the conversation was about then I found out it had nothing to do with me at all and it was really quite the opposite of what I thought it was about. I do not know what happens with my mind and why it thinks this way. I just make myself self conscious and I just get really freaked out. It sucks. Another thing that I am afraid with is getting pulled over by a cop. I am a typical teenage driver and yes, I do indeed tend to speed quite a bit, especially at night. So when I am driving home and it is dark, and lets say I am going 60 in a 50, and I see lights in the distance, I make myself believe that the other car is a cop and I slow down a lot and quite frankly lose a lot of time because I will go down to like forty five and I am usually late at night because of undisclosed reasons.